Journal entry's from Savannah's stay in the hospital.(Part 1) Sorry the posts are so long!

I decided that instead of trying to tell every little thing about Savannah's long stay in the hospital that I would just include some of my journal entries from her stay. I will even go back to the beginning. I think telling the story up to the last surgery was needed but I think the rest and some of the previous would be better told through my journal. I wrote in a small journal every day that I was with Savannah. Things that were happening, things I was feeling, things Daniel was feeling, etc. I will leave out a lot of the technical terms cause they are just confusing. Some is just bits and pieces of things that were going on. Others were things on our mind. So here goes:

9/14/09- I touched Savannah for the first time. Just barely with my finger. Her skin is still so fragile.

Savannah likes to hear her mommy and daddy talk to her. Her sats just way up when she hears our voice.

9/15/09 - was given blood. She wasn't replenishing what they were taking from her fast enough.

Reduced rate on her vent some.

Found a heart Murmur.

Taken to conference room and told that Savannah has grade 3 and grade 4 bleed on her brain.

Written by daddy: Miss Savannah Grace is a fighter and is very strong. It is so hard to see her and not be able to hold her. She has great nurses that take care of her but it is so hard because Mommy and Daddy are the ones that should be taking care of her. We love her soooo much. Both Shawna and I had a melt down when Dr. N told us about her brain bleeds. I have never cried that hard in my entire life. It is so amazing how much my love for Shawna and Savannah grow everyday. I feel so helpless no being able to do anything for her, but I know that God is good and will watch over our little Savannah. Today has truly been the hardest day of our lives, tears will not stop flowing down our face. I know when we leave here tonight it will be hard but we will be back at 5am.

9/15/09

Reduced her pressure and rate on the ventilator.

9/16/09

Doctor decided to try 1cc of pedialyte every 6 hours and if she does good then go to every 3.

Started giving her caffeine to help her to remember to breathe on her own.

So far brain bleed is not getting larger. Will have another head ultrasound on Friday.

Walked in after pumping, Daniel was already in there, and her alarm was going off. This was the first time we had seen this. Her oxygen level dropped to 60. They suctioned her ventilator and she was fine but this was super scary.

We we able to see her briefly without her eyes covered by the patch. She is so beautiful. She looks so much like her daddy. We also each got to hold her hand. She grabbed her mommy's finger. This made me tear up a lot.

She didn't do so well with the pedialyte. It just kinda sat in her tummy so they suctioned it out and will try again.

3/17/09

They are going to stop her feedings and try in a few days. She just isn't tolerating it yet.

Going to put some nutrients through her IV.

Checked on Murmur and said it is very small.

At one point Savannah had her hand on the plastic thing holding her ventilator so we asked if it would hurt anything. The respiratory therapist said no that some babies would grab on to their actual vent tubes and go to sleep. About that time Savannah grabbed hers. It was so cute and was like she heard the RT say it and was like "Look I can do it too!" She is so smart.

She will be getting sedated tonight to help her sleep.

9/18/09

She had her first poop today. It got all over her Foley catheter so they took it out and put a diaper on her.

From Daddy: Savannah likes to spread her legs and the nurses like them to stay bent and closed. Her nurse went and got some extra beanie bags to help her hold her legs up. Needless to say she didn't like this. So after many many kicks, Savannah finally kicked one of the beanies away and spread her legs again. But the funny thing was that every time her nurse would come over she would move her legs back (like she was innocent). Then as soon as her nurse would walk away she would spread her legs back out. I can already tell she is really smart and is going to get into a lot of trouble in years to come (We can't wait!) She is loved by so many people. We even had a family who we don't even know drop off a stuffed tiger and a card. In the card they stated that we don't know them, but they are praying for our little one. This was very encouraging and uplifting.

9/19/09

No signs of Hydrocephalus from the brain bleed yet.

Dr. N decided to try her on Mommy's breast milk instead of pedialyte and see how she does.

Mommy and Daddy were both able to hold her hand tonight and talk to her. Mommy told her that she loved her and she squeezed Mommy's finger. Daddy got ready to let go and she squeezed him harder like she didn't want him to let go. We want to try and make it a point to open her incubator and talk to her daily. We are so scared that she is going to forget our voices or who we are.

Also in the process of holding her hand and taking her pictures we discovered her first freckle. It is on he left hand ring finger. It is so cute.

From Mommy: Savannah seems like she has been resting easier today. Not as agitated, sleeping a lot on her own without sedation. She is so sweet, we could just stare at her for hours. She is such a beautiful little girl. We can't begin to put into words the love we have for her. I just watch her daddy look at her and can see the love in his eyes. He is such a proud daddy and is already wrapped around her little finger. I fall in love with him all over again every time I see him with her. He is an Amazing Daddy!

A Poem From Daddy:

For God so loved,

He gave his only.

Our only came,

She came too soon.

We tried so hard,

But it would not work.

For God had a plan,

To put her to work.

To fathom the love of a parent seemed far fetched,

Because our little Zachary went straight to Heaven to rest.

Now she is here for all to see,

And the love of a parent is real to me.

We don't get to take her home at this time,

but she will live in my heart til the end of time.

9/20

Savannah did very well on Mommy's breast milk. She knew exactly what she wanted. This made mommy cry that she was finally able to give something to her little girl.

Had to give her a little more blood.

Mommy and Daddy got to do a lot of hands on with Miss Savannah tonight. She was very good. First, daddy got to change her diaper, then he got to hold her up in the air so they could zero out the bed to weigh her. She lost 4 oz. She weighs 1 lbs 13 ounces. Mommy got to hold Savannah up while they put her new Pooh sheet on her bed. Mommy got to hold her up a little longer and they even took her eye shield off so we got lots of pics.

9/21

Savannah was turned on her tummy for the first time and is receiving room air through her vent.

She has a head full of dark brown hair all over.

Her murmur may be slightly bigger.

Took her off the jaundice light.

Started feeding her every 9 hours instead of 12 now.

Savannah is such a strong little girl. She was laying on her tummy tonight and she literally picked head up and tried to turn it over but the ventilator wouldn't let her. She also got up on her knees like she was gonna crawl. She is so feisty.

9/22

Increased feedings to every 6 hours.

Going to try to do picc line tonight or tomorrow so they can take the lines out of her belly button.

She did get her picc line put in her leg and one of her lines came out of her belly. The other will come out in a few days.

Tonight Savannah put her hands over her eyes like it was too bright so we covered the top of her incubator with a blanket. She then looks like she gives us a thumbs up and moves her hand away. lol

Head Ultrasound looks the same. Still no sign of hydrocephalus.

9/23

She is now getting fed every 3 hours.

She was wide awake when we got here tonight.

She is so strong. When her nurse was changing her diaper while she was on her tummy, she pushed up with her elbows and then put her butt up in the air with her feet. We thought she was going to stand up. We were too slow with the camera, so I only got pics of her on her knees with her butt in the air.

9/24

Nurse said her head still feels good and closed but is a little heavy which is to be expected with a bleed. She said it could go either way. The bleed could either reabsorb and she get lucky or it could block the drainage of fluid and cause hydrocephalus.

Mommy got to change Savannah's diaper for the first time tonight.

Will start increasing breast milk by 1cc every 12 hours.

Back on photo light due to bilirubin being up.

9/25

She is up to 3cc's on feeding.

Sr. W called this afternoon to tell us that Savannah's picc line was showing redness and her blood count was high so they are starting her on antibiotics and taking out her picc line and umbilical line. They will put in a regular I.V. and try a new picc line tomorrow. He said the infection was in her blood stream but he thinks we caught it early. This was the first time a doc has called us on the phone so it scared us.

Started her antibiotics for the possible infection. She now has a regular I.V. in her left foot.

She is back off the photo light.

Daddy noticed that her left foot looked red and puffy and mentioned it to the nurse. She said it was fine. When we called later that night they had taken that I.V. out and put a new one in her right foot.

Her culture came back as gram negative . She is on the correct antibiotics for that.

9/26

She is back up to the weight of 2lbs. 1oz.

9/27

They may put her on cpap if her next blood gases are good.

They called us at 2 pm to tell us that they had taken her off the ventilator and she is on the c-pap. So far everything is going well.

From daddy:

At about 5:30pm we decided to go to the hospital to see Ms. Savannah because she wasn't doing too good on the c-pap. Well while we were walking in Dr. W was calling mommy's cell phone. Found out that the infection she had was actually in her trach and was e. coli. and they switched her antibiotics to get rid of it.

Mommy got to hold Savannah for the first time today. Then daddy got a few min. to hold her. I was getting all teary eyed when I saw Shawna holding our little snuggle bug. I know she is going to be a great mother. Over all she is doing really well now. At one point the c-pap had slipped out of her nose and no one had noticed until daddy said something about it. Dr. W said "well that's a good test because she is still sating in the 90's without the c-pap".

Starting to up feedings by 1 cc every 9 hours.

She is currently on 4 cc's every 3 hours.

We love our little snuggle bug soooo much. Lot's of pics of us holding her for the first time today.

9/28

Put new picc line in.

Heart echo showed that she still has a small murmur but the cardiologist still wants to leave it alone for now.

From Daddy:I got to hear Savannah cry for the second time. The first time was when she was born. She sounds hoarse because she has only had the vent out for 2 days. This was the sweetest sound a daddy could ask for. I hope to hear this sound a lot more. I hope the next time I hear her cry mommy can hear her too.

9/29

From Daddy: We were able to hold Savannah again tonight. She does very well on her sats when we hold her. It gives me goose pimples to see Shawna hold our sweet little angel. Savannah is still doing good with her feedings and blood gases. They may increase her feedings tomorrow.

Savannah sucked on her pacifier for the first time.

9/30

Head u/s showed bleeds are the same.

She had a rough night last night with apnea and bradycardia but is doing ok now.

She keeps pulling the cpap out of her nose.

10/1

Put her on a bump rate on the cpap. This means she will be given 10 strong breaths a minute.

Needed more blood this morning.

She us up to 8 cc's every 3 hours of breast milk.

A Mr. Owens stopped by today. He gave blood at Life South and he was a match for Savannah and was CMV negative. He said he gives blood every 2 months and somehow he was told that his blood was going to Savannah. He came an scrubbed in to visit her. This was a special favor since we were only allowing parents and grandparents back there. He said he always visits the patients that his blood is tagged for. The world needs more people like this in it.

Tonight we were talking to Savannah and her daddy was telling her how beautiful she was. She would open her eyes and just look at him. He asked her if she was a daddy's girl and it looked as if she grinned. That made his day. I fall in love with him all over again when I see him with Savannah. I know they will be so close.

10/2

Her weight is now 2lbs 4 oz.

Her head measurement increased a bit more than normal but they told us it didn't mean treatment that he head still felt great.

From Mommy: I worry so much about her little head. I don't want her to have to go through all these complications. She is so sweet and it will break my heart to see her have to be in any pain. Her daddy and I pray to God daily that she will get better soon and not have to be in any pain. We are so in love with her and proud of the strong little girl she is.

Her feedings are at 10cc's.

From Mommy: Mommy and Daddy were able to hold Savannah again tonight. We were so very excited. We wish we could hold her all the time. She does so good when we hold her. First of all, she loves to be wrapped in her blanket. She is a little snuggle bug. She also sats really high when we hold her. She was sating 100% on room air at one point when mommy held her and 100% almost the whole time daddy held her with a very small amount of oxygen. She just lays there so content in our arms. The nurses even comment on how well she does in our arms. Personally I think the doctor needs to write orders for us to hold her several hours a day so she will do well. hehe

10/3

Had to give her more blood.

She looks really tired to us today. We are hoping she will get some good rest tonight and feel better tomorrow.

10/4

Nurse called at 7 am. They had to reintubate her at 3am. We are very angry they did not call when it happened. She started going limp and not doing so well on the cpap. They said she is doing alot better on the vent and is feisty now. Guess she was just tired. This was her first major set back.

Savannah has started to show signs of hydrocephalus. Her head is feeling full and went from 25 3/4 to 27 cm overnight. This could be a reason for all the bradys and apneas and why she had to be reintubated. We will have an ultrasound in the morning to see if we need to take her to Birmingham. We are so scared!

Weight is 2lbs. 8oz.

10/5

She had her ultrasound and we are waiting for results.

She lost weight today. 2lbs 8 oz.

We feel like the docs are not being aggressive enough.

10/6

From Daddy: When we saw her today they put a pink bow in her hair. They also ran out of beanies so she is wrapped in a blanket thing. The head ultrasound shows no changes but we are still really worried about everything. We had the nurse write in the chart that we wanted a call!!

She now weighs 2lbs 9 0z and her head measurement stayed the same.

10/7

Increased feeds to 15cc's.

Weight 2lbs 11 0z.

Head size 28.

Savannah is more than likely gonna have to go to Birmingham. She will need a subgaleal shunt. We don't know when it will be though.

10/8

At the visit we made the doc call Birmingham while we were there. They kept dragging their feet and we didn't want to wait any longer!! So he called while we stood there. They said they would come get her that afternoon. So Daddy went to work and Mommy ran home to pack.

From Daddy: The nurse called me @ work around 2:15pm and said that the transport team was on their way and we had about 30 minutes to get there. I called Shawna but she was not where near packed so she could not come to see Savannah off because we needed to be ready to leave soon too. So daddy had to come and see her off. When I got there the transport team had just arrived. She would be going to the Children's Hospital by the Care Flight Team. She got her first Helicopter ride on her daddy's birthday. I was able to have some one on one time with her before they got her ready. She was very alert and when I would tell her that I loved her and that everything would be ok she would squeeze my finger and melt my heart with her baby blue eyes. I was able to follow her to the helicopter pad and take a few pictures with the disposable camera since I didnt have our digital with me. I was holding things together pretty well at this point. After she was loaded in they started to take off. I absolutely lost it. So I kinda composed myself so I could call Shawna. I started feeling really sick so I ran to the bathroom and called Shawna in hysterics. My sweet little angel was in flight to the Children's Hospital and Mommy and Daddy couldn't ride with her.

I will continue in another post on the journal entry's from her stay at children's. As you can tell it was a long hard journey.

Savannah's time at The Children's Hospital.

I forgot to mention in the last post that all this happened on Daniel's Birthday. We arrived at the Children's hospital around 7pm that evening. The NICU was closed at the time due to another baby having some complications but they were nice enough to let us in for a few minutes to visit with her so that we could see that she was ok. She was settled in and resting well. We were told that no decisions had been made on when the surgery for shunt placement would be and that as soon as a neurosurgeon rounded on her they would call us. So after about 15 minutes we had to leave and go find us a hotel for the night. It was so late and dark and we knew nothing about B'ham so we just drove a few blocks and pulled into a Marriott hotel. It ended up being a really really nice hotel and since it was late and we had not eaten yet we just paid the $250 for one night and left it at that. But the room was amazing. Not that it mattered. We didn't get much sleep that night. We were so nervous, scared, uneasy, you name it, we felt it. We knew nothing of what the surgery would entail. No one had told us anything other than the fact that our daughter had fluid on her brain and something needed to be done about it. We called at Midnight that night to check on Savannah and the nurse was super nice. She answered alot of the questions we had about how things worked there. The NICU hours were 9am to 2pm; 5pm to 10pm; and 12am to 7am. The times they were closed were for shift change. Well we received a call the next morning from one of the neurosurgeons explaining to us that Savannah needed surgery and that she needed that day, soon in fact. She explained that Savannah had been taken for a CT scan earlier that morning and it showed that the grade 4 bleed had blocked the pathways where the fluid normally would go. She then told us that she would need a Subgaleal Shunt which is temporary and that the reason she was receiving this one instead of the Permanent VP (ventricularparataneal) shunt is because she was still too little. She needed to be at least 4 lbs, preferably bigger in order to get the permanent one. So they were going to be taking her to surgery ASAP. Then we had to talk to the anesthesiologist on the phone and she let us know all the risks which are pretty much the same as with anyone and we had to give consent. They promised us that they would not take her down to surgery until we got there. So we checked out of the hotel, loaded up all of our stuff, and hurried to the hospital. My parents and grandparents were there when we got there and Daniel and I went in to the NICU to see Savannah while they waited in the waiting room. We visited with her for a little while and we were able to meet the neurosurgeon who was going to be perfoming the surgery. Dr. O, although lacking in bedside manner, is chief of neurosurgery and has people from all over the world who come to learn and work under him. So although we did not care for his dry personality, we loved the fact that he was so qualified. I didn't want him or need him to be my friend I just needed him to fix my little girl. Soon after speaking with him they brought the portable bed with all the portable equipment. They moved her to this bed and told us to follow them. On our way out to the elevators my parents, grandparents, and preacher (at the time) and his wife were able to see her. We rode the elevator down and then walked down the long halls. (they probably just seemed long at the time). They took us into this holding room where we would wait for all the docs and nurses to get prepared for her. We waited what seemed like an eternity. Daniel and I both were so nervous that we later found out that each of us had to lean against the wall because of almost passing out. Seeing your daughter in this situation and knowing that she would be leaving to have surgery when she was sooooo tiny was the hardest thing ever. Especially with the type of surgery it was. As we were all standing there waiting for the last of the people to come the respiratory looks down and tells us that she had never turned on the ventilator and that Savannah had been breathing on her own that whole time. And her Sats were high. This was a good sign. But since she was about to have surgery they didn't want her getting too tired so they turned it on. Soon the rest of the crew showed up and they rolled our precious little girl away. Both of us just stood there and cried. It was so hard to watch them roll her down the hall. So we went to the waiting room and Daniel went back upstairs to tell everyone to come down to that waiting room. We were told that this surgery would take a couple hours and that they would call as soon as the surgery had actually started. So I left to go pump Savannah's breast milk down in the lactation center and my mom went with me. We were gone for about 30 minutes and when we got back Daniel said they had just called him to let us know that the surgery had started. So we got comfortable for the long wait. It wasn't 5 minutes later and Dr. O is coming out tapping me on the shoulder and says "Mr. and Mrs. Hatfield...over hear" and points to the corner. He has this horrible look on his face. We are all freaking out. My heart was racing and I felt sick. He begins by telling us in all these doctor terms what could have gone wrong with the surgery. He says nothing about how Savannah is doing and still has this very grim look on his face. Finally, I just interrupted and asked if my little girl was ok. He said "the child is fine." So then I was able to breathe again and start comprehending what he was saying. Everything prior to that was just rubbish. (Hey I told you he had a horrible bedside manner but he is a great doctor). So He told us about the procedure and how the subgaleal shunt goes just under the scalp and how she would have a large pocket of fluid under her scalp that would look pretty abnormal. But he said this was a good sign that the shunt is doing its job. He said to give the nurses about an hour to get things back settled before we went back in to the NICU. So we decided to go get something for breakfast. I could hardly eat but we went. Right before we went our preacher and his wife left. They would not have been able to see Savannah anyway because only parents and grandparents are allowed in the NICU during flu season. So we finally go up there to see her, just Daniel and I, and she looked so pitiful. She was still heavily under the anesthesia and she was just laying there all limp and pitiful looking. She had this big bandage on her head. The nurse handed me a little bag with her hair in it that they had to shave. (Her first haircut so to speak). So we sat with her for a couple hours, just staring at her, cause she wasn't moving around like her normal self due to the meds. So we decided to leave, get lunch, and find a new hotel to stay in since she was resting so well. We left and ate lunch with my parents and grandparents. Well while we were at lunch I got a phone call from the hospital. My heart dropped!!! I thought something had happened since they said that would be the only reason they would call. Well it was her nurse and it ended up being great news. They had just extubated her (took her off the ventilator) and she was now on oxygen nasal cannula. So she skipped right over the cpap machine. They said she was doing great and was on very low oxygen. I just wanted to cry. Our little girl is soooo strong. So we left the restaurant and drove down the street to a Best Western. We checked in there and thought it was gonna be a good place to stay because it was just a few exits up from the hospital exit. It had a small fridge to store my breast milk and there was a Walmart across the street. So we took all of our stuff in and then went back to the hospital. Savannah was a little more alert and moving around and her face was so beautiful without that big tube down her throat. She still had the feeding tube in her mouth but they later moved that to her nose. She did great the rest of that day. Well that night the Best Western turned out to be a bust. The fridge stopped working in the middle of the night and I had to throw out a good bit of breast milk. I was not happy. So the next morning. we packed up once again, checked out, and went back up to the hospital. We were told she had done great all night. We were able to see a small pocket of fluid on the side of her head so we knew things were going good. Of course they still had to measure her head daily to keep an eye on it. The average life span of the temporary shunt is like 35 days. So now all we had to do was sit and wait for her to gain weight. Her vital signs were staying good and she would drop her heart rate every now and then but that was to be expected in a preemie and she always brought it back up on her own. That night we checked in to a Holiday Inn Suites. We ended up staying there for about a week. On Sunday we went and found a church and then went to the hospital to see our sweet girl. My parents and grandparents drove up every Sunday and went to church and then came to the hospital with us. Then we went to lunch. On Monday Daniel had to go back to work. You cannot even imagine how hard this was for him. So he got up early and made the long drive to Montgomery and I went to the hospital. I would stay with Savannah until they shut down the NICU at 2 and then I would either go shopping or back to the hotel to rest. Daniel would get home around 7 at night and we would go back up to the hospital and visit with Savannah until 10 when the unit shut down again. This is how the weeks went the whole time we were there, with the exception of when we moved, but I will get to that later. On the weekends we would spend as much time at the hospital as we could. After a week of staying in the Holiday Inn the financial aspect started to add up so once again we were looking for a place to stay. After seeing several nasty places we came across the Marriott towne suites. These people were super generous. They gave us a great rate for a room with a full kitchen. They were amazing. And they had a laundromat. So once again we moved all of our stuff into a new place. Well about 6 days after Savannah's surgery I kept telling the nurse that something was not right with Savannah. She was sleeping all of the time and she kept putting her arms over her eyes like her head hurt. They kept telling me that it was nothing and that everything was fine. Then I told them that I thought her pouch on her head felt smaller, almost gone. They told me that it could happen sometimes and doesn't necessarily man anything is wrong. Well that night, after not feeling right all day, I continued to push the issue. They measured her head and it had gone up a whole centimeter over night. So I made them call Neurosurgery. They took her for a Cat Scan and sure enough her shunt had stopped working. It was blocked and was no longer allowing the fluid to drain. Well the next morning a neurosurgeon came in and stuck a needle into her intracranial space to draw off some fluid just to make sure that there was no infection. They would have to do a different surgery if there was infection. They let it grow for a day and then 9 days after her initial shunt placement they went in a did a shunt revision. This meant another dangerous surgery, another wait in the dreaded waiting room, and another awkward talk with Dr. O. He came out and said that some of the blood from the initial bleed had broken off and clogged up the shunt. This was fairly common. He said it would probably happen again and that the average life of these things was still 35 days. Well guess what? She still has that same shunt in her head. It was put in on October 18th. That is way more than 35 days. And we are still going with it. The recovery was the same. She came back from surgery on the vent but was taken off very soon. So then it was just a waiting game. I think this post has been long enough so I will continue soon in another post.

This picture was taken just a little while after her first surgery..

They let us put a hat on her to cover her bandage.

Look No Ventilator!!

Catching Up!

Some of you have asked me if I was gonna start blogging again. I have thought about it and it is something I want to start again. The last several months have been a complete blur but things are finally starting to get back to normal. Or at least our version of normal for now. Not only do I want to catch everyone up on our life over the past 5 months but I want to use this as a journal to keep up with my sweet baby girl's life. Obviously I can't put the last 5 months in one entry so I will break them up. This first one will be about the first 3 weeks in Baptist South NICU.


When I first got there, after leaving the hospital, I was so nervous about seeing her. I mean Daniel had brought me back pictures but as you know pictures just aren't the same. I walked in and saw my baby, mask over her eyes, bright light shining down on her, several tubes coming out of her, a tube breathing for her, no clothes on, just laying there...so helpless. I got this huge knot in my stomach and just started crying. I mean, I was her mommy....why could I not help her? The nurses were really nice and came over and answered all of our questions. They told us that she had an infection that she had gotten when they put the tube down her throat. They told us that it would be the first of many and that all preemie babies get infections. (Let me just say that this was her one and only infections as of today). The next couple days were pretty much the same. Then we spoke with a doctor who told us that due to her being so early, they needed to do an ultrasound of her head because she was at risk for having a brain bleed. He didn't go into any more detail at that time. The next day however he wanted to sit down with us in a conference room and talk so we knew something was wrong. He started out by drawing a diagram and showing us the 4 stages of a brain bleed. 1 being not that bad 4 being the worst. After this he proceeds to tell us that she has a grade 3 on one side of her brain and a grade 4 on the other. We were completely devastated. He proceeded to tell us that she would more than likely have some very bad disabilities. Things like Cerebal Palsy, blindness, Mental Retardation, Deafness, ect. He proceeded to say that the brain is a complex thing that they still don't have mapped out so there was no way to tell how she would respond. He said he had seen grade 4 bleeds that caused detrimental effects to where the children could not funtion in normal life and he had seen grade 4 bleeds that you would never know the child had it. So he did leave us with a little hope. He told us that the nurses were going to start measuring her head circumference daily because if started to grow too rapidly that could mean that she had developed Hydrocephalus, which is basically fluid on the brain, which would be caused from the blood blocking the normal fluid drainage pathways. This would mean she would need surgery to put a shunt in her brain. So this was something we worried about daily. We sat in that conference room for the longest time just holding each other and crying. It hit us so hard that this was happening to our little girl. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to hear. We prayed about it and decided that we were gonna trust God and have faith that everything would be fine.

I'm gonna cut alot of this short cause if I told every single thing we would be here for a LONG time. It was a whole week before we were able to do anything but touch her briefly. After a week Daniel was able to change her diaper and I was able to pick her up, not hold her, but just pick her up long enough for the nurse to change her sheet. She was only on the ventilator for 2 weeks. She has always had amazing lungs. They took her off and put her on a cpap machine which is basically a sleep apnea machine. That was the day we first got to hold our sweet girl. That was the best feeling in the world. I cannot even put into words how we felt. She was so so tiny but so so beautiful. She did really good with that. She stayed on Cpap for about a week and did really well but then she started having trouble again so they had to put her back on the ventilator. We soon found out it was due to the development of hydrocephalus. All within 24 hours we found this out and were told that she would be taken to The Children's hospital in Birmingham, AL. I hurried home to get things together for us to go up there because they said I had time but by the time I got home they called and said they were on their way. So Daniel was the only one that made it to the hospital to see her off. He was able to talk to her some before the put her in the transport bed. He walked her to the helicopter and took some pictures and then watched them take off with her. He called me and could hardly talk he was crying so hard. He said it was soooo hard to watch her leave like that and not be able to go with her. He got to our apartment and we left and went straight to the Children's Hospital and that's where our next phase began. Here are a few pics from Savannah's time in Montgomery.

This is a pic of Savannah right after she was born being taken to the NICU at Baptist East.


This is my sweet girl hooked up to everything.


This just shows how tiny she was.



First time holding my sweet girl.

Being transported to Children's Hospital.

Savannah Grace Hatfield

Savannah is here!

Born September 13th 2009.

3:56 a.m.

2lbs. 1oz.

13 1/2 inches long



I know many of you have been waiting for her birth story. Sorry it has taken me so long to post but I know you all understand how busy things have been for us. It all started on Labor Day. I had to go in to the hospital to be monitored for a little while because I was having a few things happen that just didnt seem right. We spent a couple hours there, saw the on call doctor, he checked me, I had and ultrasound, and then he sent me home. He said that everything was fine and my cervix was still closed. Well I still felt uneasy but went home anyway. They had told me that since I had been checked that I should expect some spotting in the next day or two. Well Wednesday morning I woke up to bright red spotting. I was told to expect this but I still didn't feel right about it. So I called my doctor and was told to come in for an ultrasound. My mom drove me there and Daniel met me there. I went in and had the ultrasound and the ultrasound tech said " Oh Shawna!" and had this horrible look on her face. She proceeds to tell me that I am 4 centimeters dialated and the only thing keeping Savannah in is my cerclage. Of course I start to panic because she is acting like I was gonna be delivering her that day. Well Doc Dupre comes in and talks to us and says that I need to go to the hospital and get put on magnesium and put on my head in the bed to see if we can stop labor. He didnt want me getting up at all so I was taken by ambulance just across the street. They had my L&D room ready waiting on me when I got there and all the nurses got to work very quickly on me. Of course I am a hard stick and it took them 6 times, even with the anesthisist, to get my I.V. in. Well they fixed my bed to where I was practically on my head and got the magnesium started. I was also put on antibiotics and was given a steroid shot to help develop Savannah's lungs (I got another one 24 hours later. They told us that not going into labor for 48 hours from the first steroid shot was crucial). I was absolutely paniced by this time. Daniel too. It was all happening so fast. Well soon things started to calm down some. The magnesium appeared to be working. I wasnt having any contractions. So on Friday they decided to take me off of the magnesium and give me terbutaline to prevent contractions. I was also given a nerve pill as this medication can make you very jittery. Throughout all of this I was having severe back pain which we thought was from the position I was laying in. So they would give me staydol and phenergan pretty frequently. Friday happened to be my birthday so my mom invited some people and we had a little party. We had cake and the doc and my nurses joined in. Things were still going ok. Well Saturday morning when I woke up my back was hurting alot and I just didnt feel good so they gave me Lortab which didnt help. By early afternoon my stomach was hurting too and I was in tears. They kept telling me the monitor wasnt picking up any contractions and that I was probably hurting from constipation. I told them I was having contractions but this was my first child and they didnt believe me. SO they gave me staydol and phenergan and it knocked me out for an hour but as soon as I woke up I was in tears. Well sometime that evening I told my nurse I didnt feel right and when she went to check me there was blood every where. Luckily Dr. Dupre was on call all weekend so he came in to examine me and I was 5 centimeters dialated. He told us he no longer thought we could hold off weeks but more like days or hours. They started me back on magnesium, a double dose, and things progressed really fast from there. Daniel called my parents and told them that they needed to come. I was still holding out hope that the magnesium would work and I started to panic when I saw them come in and get the baby bed ready. ( I later found out that they had the incubator placed right outside my door but Daniel threatened everyone to not tell me it was there.) I cannot even describe to you the feelings I was having at this point. It's all still a blur. So by the time my parents got there I was is full on labor. And I had complete back labor. Horrible Horrible Horrible pain. At some point my grandparents and Carol Leah got there but I don't remember much about that. I just remember the agonizing pain. Everyone said they could hear me yelling down the hall. I could not even cry it hurt so bad. Plus they ran out of Staydol so I had nothing to even take the edge off. They had to run to the pharmacy just to get some. By the time the anesthesiologist got there I was 8 centimeters and was told I could no longer have an epidural, it was to late, so they gave me a spinal. Finally relief! (I later found out that the pain was intensified because my bag of water was bulging through and the cerclage was ripping). I was so exhausted by this point that I fell asleep while he was taking the cerclage out and had to be woken up to push. I had to push more than I thought I would with her. She was coming out sunny side up and had to be pushed back in twice. Finally at 3:56 am she made her appearance. She made several little tiny cries that sounded like a kitten. Daniel cut the cord (which he was so hoping he would get to do) and they wisked her off to another part of the room to examine and work on her. Daniel went over with her and so did my mom (she was in there too). So they could see everything that was going on with her. I was frantically trying to read faces to see what was going on. In the meantime my doctor could not get my uterus to stop bleeding..turns out part of the placenta was left behind and once removed, finally stopped. Finally my mom looked over and gave me a thumbs up to let me know she was ok. They got me fixed up and soon after they wheeled her by me so that I could see her (for a few seconds) before they took her to the nicu. I remember everyone that was there came in the room soon after and I found out how much she weighed and how long she was. I then found out that she would be transferred to the NICU at Baptist south. They came and got me about and hour later and wheeled me to the NICU so that I could see her before they took her. That was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. And it was only the beginning of a series of hardest things I have ever had to do. Knowing that she was leaving and going to another hospital and I had to stay at that hospital was horrible. Words can't describe the feelings. Daniel left soon after getting me settled in to my room to go see her. My dad went with him. I demanded to get out of the hospital the next morning even though legally I should have been there 48hours after the birth but my doc let me go cause he knew I would call with any problems. So Monday morning we left Baptist East and drove straight to Baptist south. So that is Savannah's birth story...I will add another blog of her life so far at Baptist south soon! Please continue to pray for our sweet strong girl!

24 weeks tommorrow and Finally getting some things done!

Today was my 24 week appt. I will be 24 weeks tomorrow. We have reached our first goal. This is the point that Savannah would have a chance at survival if delivered now. Things are still looking good. Still no sign of the placental tear. My cervix is closed. And apparently we have a little chunky monkey on our hands. The average weight for a 24 week baby is 1lbs 3oz. Our Savannah weighs 1lbs. 10oz! The nurse was shocked at that number and said that if I gave birth at 36 weeks when the cerclage is taken out then she predicts her to be 8-9lbs. If full term she predicts 10-11..WOW! Now Doc. Dupre was a little more reserved with his guess. He said that if she continues to grow at the rate she is now (which could increase or decrease) then he thinks full term she will be around 8-9 lbs. Still a chunky monkey in my book. I discussed quite a few things with him and since things seem to be going good now I don't see him again until Sep. 15th. I will have my glucose test then too. Hopefully I will pass this one the same as I did the last one. And Thankfully I had not gained any weight since last week. We had an ultrasound but didn't get any good pictures because she was facing away from us but at least she is head down. Hopefully she will stay that way.

So over the last couple weeks Daniel and I have ordered quite a few things for Savannah and almost all of them have arrived. We had the hardest time finding a pack n play that we both liked. We had looked online in all the stores and could not decide on anything. The pack n play is what Savannah will sleep in when she comes home. So it is in our room and we wanted something that would not clash or look bad with our room decor. So of course all the cute pink girly ones were out of the question and every neutral colored one we came across was just plain ugly or not even the least bit girly. Finally I came across the Albee Baby website. Now normally I am leery about ordering from stores I know nothing about but I had heard from a few people that they were reputable. We found the perfect pack n play for us and it was even cheaper than most we had looked at. Also there was no tax and anything over $100 dollars shipped for free. We received it in less than a week. (Let me just add that Storkland could have ordered us the same one but would have cost $50 more!) I'll post pics below but we are in love with it. It has a bassinet on top that she can sleep in until she moves to her crib and then it turns into a pack n play which will be great for overnight trips. It has 2 night lights, one so you can see the buttons to push and one that shines in on the baby while she is sleeping so you can check on her. It plays 5 classical songs, 5 nature sounds, and has 2 levels of vibration. On the bottom it even has these little storage shelves which I am sure will come in handy. We also received our travel system. We also had a problem finding one of these we liked. If we found one that we liked the look of then it wasn't at the top of the safety list and vice versa. Finally we found a Graco passage system that we liked. It's very girly which I think will be very fitting for Savannah. It's safe, lightweight, and easy to use. We are really satisfied with it. We have all of our nursery furniture now since we received our glider/ ottoman but I wont post pics of that yet. I want to get the nursery ready first. Our bedding got here today so we can start to buy other stuff. We had to wait so we could match the colors. We are having to be creative with her room since we live in an apartment that will not allow us to paint but I think it will turn out fine. Here are a few pics.

Follow up Baby Doc Appt. 22wks 5days

We had a doc appt today for a follow up on the cerclage. Things are looking good so far. We still have a long way to go and things could happen at anytime but as of right now we are on track. My contractions have slowed to only 1 or 2 a day which is good and Savannah is growing beautifully. She had her ankles crossed the whole time which was cute. She is still breech but still has some time to turn. I had gained 5 lbs. in 2 weeks. YIKES! But still on track. I am still 2lbs. under prepregnancy weight. We were able to talk to the doc about alot of things. He has started me on Prilosec for my acid indigestion. He said that could be causing my nausea. So hopefully that will get better. I told Daniel if the old wives tale is true that Savannah should have a head full of hair. He also has prescribed me some Ambien to sleep. I told him how I can take tylenol pm and sleep for about 2 hours but then I am wide awake, mind racing, tossing and turning. He said it was probably because on top of the normal pregnancy discomforts with sleeping I am dealing with alot of stress that keeps my mind racing and I am also in bed all day not exerting any energy. He said that I should take an Ambien occasionally so that my body doesnt get run down. I'm not sure how I feel about taking something like that but I mean I will if it means keeping my Savannah healthy. We also discussed how Savannah kicks so low all the time and how I am scared she will break my water. She doesnt kick low everytime but most of the time. He said that she def. could but that there is nothing you can do about it. He said I can try changing positions and try an coax her into moving but its really just a chance thing. She kicks so hard and so often I just hope she doesnt kick my water bag just right. We are 1 week and 2 days away from the point at which Savannah could survive outside her mommy but of course we are hoping for many more weeks. I go back to the doc on Sept. 1st. We will have another ultrasound and talk and then I will go back in two weeks. This is when I will have my 2nd glucose test. He told me that I am now allowed to get out of the house for 2 hours at a time. So I hopefully will be able to start attending Sunday morning worship again. I could go for longer with a wheel chair but to church or out to eat or to a movie is what I can do without one. He said I needed to get out of the house some for my minds sake. But I can only go out every few days, not every day. I am so thankful that things are going well. Savannah is such a fighter already and I know she is gonna be a handful when she gets here and i can't wait. lol We finally have our bedding, pack n play, travel system, and glider/ottoman ordered. So once they get here I can start purchasing some of the little things and sit in my glider and watch Daniel get the nursery together. We already have a bunch of things for Savannah. She is gonna be one spoiled little girl! Here are some pics from the ultrasound today. The first one is of her feet. Daniel said she has my toes. lol Her ankles were crossed like that the whole time like she was kicking back.

This next one is another view to show us she is a girl. She is gonna love me flashing her girly parts everywhere. lol

This last one is my favorite. It is her profile and I think she looks just beautiful if I do say so myself. I think she looks just like her daddy.

Back to Bed with a Bundle of Nerves!

This past Sunday a week ago I went to worship in the morning time but was in alot of pain. By the time I got to Longhorn afterward I could barely walk. My lower abdomen was hurting soo bad and I was almost in tears. I got home and called the on call doctor which of course was the doctor I had just switched from. It took him an hour to call me back and then he said instead of going through the hospital that I could just come into the office and he would meet us there. Well we got there and he left us sitting in the hot car for about 10 to 15 minutes because he was on the phone. We finally get in and he says "Wow, you are in alot of pain aren't you?" He apparently saw the way I was walking. Well we go upstairs and he checks my urine first of all since he was convinced that the intense pain I was having was simply a urinary tract infection. My urine was clear! So we go in and he gets the Doppler out to listen to Savannah's heart rate. It takes him FOREVER to find it! I have never had it take that long. So of course we were panicking. He proceeds to then say "Well I'm confident your baby is alive" and then almost gives up but I guess can see the panic in our eyes. Then he says "Well I've had to send you for an ultrasound before when we couldn't find the heart rate haven't I?" I said "Yeah when we lost our first baby". He was just so insensitive which reinforced our decision to switch from him. I still don't understand how he went from being such a caring doc to what he is now. Finally he found the heart beat. Let me just say that it wasn't even that hard to find at 12 weeks and while in the hospital this last time they always found it right away unless she was really active, but at least then you could hear her kicking the Doppler. So anyway, he then examines me. He told me that everything was fine and that my cervix was closed, a little soft but closed. He proceeds to tell me that even though my urine is clear that he thinks that my bladder is irritated and causing my pain so he prescribed me a medicine that would relax my bladder and some darvocet. I of course could not stop thinking about the "little soft" cervix. I kept questioning him and he told me that it was probably nothing to worry about, some women have a soft cervix throughout their whole pregnancy, and that even if it were a problem that there is nothing they could do. He told me he could not even treat me until 24 weeks because before then it just meant something was wrong with the baby. (we recently had our anatomy ultrasound which showed everything with the baby to be perfect). I kept insisting that something be done so he said I could come in the next morning for an ultrasound to determine my cervical length. Of course at this point we really did not trust him so I called first thing the next morning to get an appointment with my new doctor. We went in to see him Monday afternoon. First of all we had an ultrasound but he said he doesn't like to even do ultrasounds in this situation because feeling is way more reliable. He examined me and said that my cervix was not only VERY soft but very short. I started freaking out because the other doc had said there was nothing that could be done. My new doc then said that we could have a cerclage put in. A stitch around the opening of the cervix to keep it closed) He said they have a high success rate and cannot be done after 24 weeks. What?!? Didn't the other doc say there was nothing that could be done UNTIL 24 weeks? Anyway, he went over the risks of the surgery which included preterm rupture of membranes, miscarriage, infection, and some other things but explained that this was our only option at saving our little girl. Without it I would deliver her pretty soon and she would not be able to survive. So we left there and went straight to Baptist East. We were both in a state of shock, very scared, nervous, and just overwhelmed. We arrived at the hospital and were checked in pretty soon after. Things from there happened very quickly. First of all, my bed was put in a position where my feet were in the air and my head was down. This was to allow gravity to move the baby away from my cervix. I had an IV started, after being stuck 5 times, I had a catheter put in, which was not fun, and then I had a magnesium drip hooked up. I was told that this was gonna make me feel horrible. Boy did it. I felt extremely hot all over, my eyeballs were even hot. I had to be given Zofran for my nausea, which did not work. I then got a bad headache which I was given Phenergan and Stadol which allowed me to rest a little. I was hooked up to a monitor that would show if I was having contractions or not. I was. Or as they called it my uterus was very irritable. That's why they gave me the magnesium. My uterus needed to be calm in order to have the surgery performed. I was told that if my uterus did not calm down by morning that I would have to wait til the evening to have my surgery. It took a while but it eventually calmed down by morning. I was taken to the surgery area around 8 am. Daniel was able to go with me there and I was able to see my family shortly before the surgery. Now this surgery required that I have a spinal. If you have talked to me about this issue at all you know that I am planning on going through natural childbirth because I am so scared of epidurals and spinals. I have bad scoliosis and on top of that I freak out when I can't move my legs. So the thought of having a spinal was just terrifying. Now it was a necessity. So they wheel me back to the operating room, transfer me to the operating table, roll me on my side and then give me the spinal. And of course they had a student do my spinal. Over all it wasn't horrible. It hurt and he had to wiggle it a bunch but he only stuck me once. Then the numbness started. I hated it! On top of that I stayed nauseated and they kept giving me stuff and it wasn't working. The doc came in and got started on the procedure. I was terrified of being awake because I didn't want to be alone if my water broke or something. The whole time I was looking at every ones faces trying to decipher how things were going. Looking for any sign on their faces as to how things were going. I later found out they had given me a little something for my nerves. The procedure was over pretty quickly and the doc told me things had went well. He said my cervix was very spongy and that we had done this procedure in the nic of time. He said the next few days were very crucial and that I would stay in the hospital that long. At this point I was still nauseated and even started to throw up. It took them a while to get me stopped but then they wheeled me into recovery. It wasn't long until Daniel and Carol Leah were able to come back. Soon I was wheeled back to my room and put back on magnesium for a few hours. I had some cramping and was given some pain medication. Every time my catheter would need emptying I would have a contraction, every time I would have pain I would have a contraction. It was very scary. The next morning, the doc came around and said that my uterus had calmed down quite a bit. He said I could have my catheter out and that I could get up to go to the bathroom, shower, and sit in the chair for lunch. That day was rough, had some spotting, very painful, and got even more painful after being up some. Told the doc about it the next morning and that's why he decided to keep me an extra day. He sent me home on Fri. But I have to keep an eye on alot of things. Very Scary being at home. Every little twinge worries me.

Since being home I am still having some contractions. He said this is fine unless I have 6 or more an hour for 2 hours straight. I've had six in one hour but no more than that. I still have some cramping on and off and some shooting pains. I have alot of pressure from the baby from where I don't have alot of cervix left. This also causes the soreness. I have to stay on bed rest, I can sit in a chair for a little while a day, and I can take a VERY quick shower. I go back to the doctor Monday, the 24th. He said if things are healed enough then I can go on very short outings as long as I stay off my feet. Such as church. So we will see. Daniel and I are constantly on edge because any little change could signal labor. Our doctor has been great though and said that there would be ALOT of communication back and forth until Savannah is born. And he said I would probably be in and out of the hospital because he would rather be over cautious than under cautious. That really comforts me. I will have the cerclage removed at 36 weeks if I make it that far and will probably have her soon after. Our first goal is to make it to 25 weeks, which is 3 weeks away, because that is the earliest she would be able to survive outside of the womb. We obviously want her to go alot farther than that but that is our first goal. This is also when he would be able to give me medication at home if the contractions became to frequent. He could start them now if absolutely necessary but he said they don't act long term so the longer I can go without them the better.

Alot of people are wondering if this is a result from coming off of bed rest this last time. Not really. Coming off of bed rest is probably what helped us find this before it was too late because of the pain I was having from the pressure. This is not something that they routinely check for because checking your cervix this early can cause this to happen so we never would have known it. Most women don't know they have an incompetent cervix until after they have a second trimester miscarriage. So we were lucky in this aspect. I however think that this has been in the works since the last time I was in the hospital. I complained to my old doc then that I thought I was having contractions and was told that it wasn't possible since I was so early. Apparently that was not true. My new doc says that while it is not common to have Braxton Hicks contractions until 24 weeks it is not impossible especially since my uterus was already irritated from the tear. I also read online that they can start in some women as early as 2 months. The doc says that braxton hicks contractions alone are not harmful, they are actually helpful but when they happen to often they can cause the cervix to soften, shorten, dilate, or all of the above. So I think it has been in the works for a while.

On a good note, Savannah is very very active. While in the hospital she would kick the heart monitor every night and the nurse could feel her lift it off my stomach. Here lately it has been soooo cute. She loves hearing her daddy talk. She gives him a high five all of the time. Last night he would say, "Savannah do you love your daddy?" and she would kick him. He just talks to her and she responds all of the time. Her kicks have definitely gotten harder. Sometimes they scare Daniel because he is caught off guard. Last night we were even able to see my stomach move when she kicks. She is most active time is from 8pm to 12am. She has a party then. She loves music and is alot more active when its on. She is definitely not a morning person, she sleeps til about 11am..lol We cannot wait to hold her in our arms. As much as I can't wait to hold her, I am so looking forward to seeing her in Daniels arms. He is already such a good daddy and she is going to be soooo lucky to have him in her life. They are going to be so close.

I just ask that you please continue to keep all of us in your prayers. Especially little Savannah. Pray that she can stay in my tummy for at least 14 more weeks.